PINEAPPLES! PART 1.

Wow, can't believe am telling you this but i just saw the two most cutest dudes i have seen in a long time, yes am an ogler, i ogle a lot when i see something nice, it's my weakness, sue me. That being besides the point, when you meet a man who seems to have it all you take a step back and think that either there must be something really off with this guy or simple, God is trynna punk you. The first thing i ask this guy is whether he is married, he says he aint, divorced? he says kinda, ummm...separated? that he is, two kids. Now, am not gonna discriminate against a man who seems to be nice, respects me and is well endowed with nice things that a girl likes, he could be my ticket to a happy relationship, he's doesn't look old and rugged, so what the hell. I say yes to his invitation to go out on a date. On this particular evening i am nervous as hell, excited, anxious, i just met this guy who seems to like me so much, or a little too much, i mean he could be one of those crazies, those guys who get obsessed and start needing you too much. I realize wow, am actually going on a date, yes it'd been quite a while i waz starting to feel a little old, i don't know what to wear so i rush to the mtumba market to look for a little dress, yer i know what you are thinking, cheap girl, but, whatever. So after a while i find a really cute dress that i know this man will like me in. I rush on back home to shower, he gets to my house right on time to pick me up. He is looking well, emmm..good, smells good and so do i, so far so good, i tell myself. Now, this is where a some things get confusing. I like a man who's romantic, wants to kiss when we are out and holds my hand, it shows that he is happy to be with me and honestly, i make him look good too. But when a man comes on too aggressive, it turns me off, i don't like it, 'pineapples!' Could you please give me a little space or do i have to buy it? It is only our first date and already you cannot stop fondling my hands, you wanna kiss me every single moment and am thinking wow, this dude is crazy, am out with a crazy person, what am i doing? So i think to myself, okay let me give him a chance, after all i have nothing to lose. Now, this guy is one of those people who can talk you to death, and even when you are six feet under you could still hear him talk, they will keep poking you to get your attention. It's not even halfway into the date and am already bored and i wanna gorge my eyes out of their socket. Eventually after dinner, we head on to part two of the date which is dancing, and am so relieved that the club is so loud and we don't have to talk. It's 2 in the morning and as he drops me home he reaches out again to kiss me, "ah...uh uh...don't be too aggressive", i say to him. I know am too picky, i know that little things turn me off and that's probably why am single. Am not looking for Will Smith, but could he at least be his twin Kenyan brother?